Nick Morgan - Public Speaking Advice and Commentary

Getting ready to give a speech: 5 Essential Steps

I’m giving a speech tonight on my favorite topic, “The Two Conversations,” so I’m spending the day getting prepared.  What do you do the day of a speech to get ready?  Following are five steps to ramping up for your big moment. 

 

1.  Go over your speech several times.  This is a speech I’ve given before – for the most part – so it’s one I’ve rehearsed thoroughly.  Now, I’m looking through my notes, focusing on the parts where I’m less than perfect and trying to get all of it in my head. 

 

2.  Have a light workout.  You want some adrenaline during the speech so that you can do your best, but not too much.  Exercising beforehand is a great way to get rid of some of the adrenaline so that it doesn’t come out during the speech in ‘happy feet’ or some other distracting way.  Don’t run a marathon – you want to unload some of the adrenaline, not lay yourself out cold.  I’ve just come back from some easy stretching and lifting.  I’m saving the aerobics for the speech itself. 

 

3.  Breathe.  Breathing is a little thing to most of us most of the time, but it accomplishes so much.  It grounds us, focuses us, makes our voice nice to listen to, and – oh, by the way – keeps us alive.  When you’re in adrenaline mode – i.e., nervous before a speech – you’re likely to take shallow breaths.  This autonomic response is not most effective for delivering a sonorous, elegant, grounded speech.  So force yourself to breathe.  Slowly, deeply, throughout the day.

 

4.  Engage in positive self-talk.  All of us have moments of self-doubt, and adrenaline magnifies those fears into mountains of worry.  Instead of climbing, cut the mental chatter with positive self-talk.  “I know the material.  I don’t have to be perfect, just show up and do my best.  I’m going to be fine.”  Whatever your fear is, take the positive side.  Mine is going blank – forgetting what I’m about to say, a holdover from my acting days, so I’m saying to myself, “I know the material, I am clear-headed and feeling good.  I’m going to remember everything.” 

 

5.  Get to the room early and get comfortable in it.  I can’t stress this one enough.  You don’t want last-minute surprises.  So get there early, check out the room, and find your beginning spot.  Run over the speech in your mind in the space, figuring out where you’re going to stand, move, and so on.  Be present in the moment!

 

By the way, the speech is on the Harvard campus, at the Kennedy School, Taubman Building, NYE – B, and it’s open to the public.  If you’re in the area, and have a free evening, drop by to hear the talk – it begins at 6:30. 

Great contemporary business speakers - 3: Susan Ershler

Few of us have climbed a mountain or won a top sales prize, so those that have done so are worth paying attention to for what they have to say.  Fewer still have climbed a really big mountain, like, say, McKinley, or won a President’s Club award – the kind that go out to the very best salespeople.  But I can only think of one person who has climbed the highest mountains on each of the 7 continents (yes, that includes Everest), and won 11 President’s Club awards over a 23-year corporate career:  Susan Ershler. 

 

Fortunately for the rest of us, Susan is back at sea level telling us how she did it – and how we can achieve our own personal ‘Everests’ through the same combination of vision and application that she used to get her to the top of Kilimanjaro, Elbrus, McKinley, Cerro Aconcagua, Vinson, Kosciuszko, and Everest, along with top sales achievements at US West, United Technologies, FedExKinko’s, and Verizon.  You can check out Susan’s career and accomplishments at http://www.susanershler.com.  There’s video of her speaking, but the best way to experience her story is to see her in person -- or read her book on the subject, Together on the Top of the World. 

 

What Susan understands is that you don’t get to the top of a mountain, or reach a personal goal, by just thinking about it.  Any quest starts there, but what counts is the execution.  On the mountain, that means putting one foot in front of the other even when you don’t think you can muster the strength to go on.  Back down here, it’s something similar:  putting in the time in meaningful practice of your expertise.  If you’re a speaker, you don’t get to be as good as Susan until and unless you put in the hours and rehearse, rehearse, rehearse.  To achieve excellence in anything, there are no easy routes, no born geniuses, no overnight successes.  There’s only hard work. 

 

For a fascinating angle on achieving this kind of excellence, check out Malcolm Gladwell’s wonderful new book, Outliers.  His how-to on acquiring expertise?  It takes 10,000 hours.  That’s the amount of time Bill Gates spent coding computers, Robert Oppenheimer spent studying science, and the Beatles spent playing small clubs in Hamburg, Germany before they hit it big.  I’m willing to bet that Susan’s logged in her 10,000 in sales and on the tallest mountains in the world. 

How do you connect with your audience? -- Part I

First of 3 blogs on connecting with your audience.

 All speakers wish to connect with their audiences.  What is the most powerful way to do that?  Every communication is two conversations – content and body language.  Body language is where connection happens. 

 

So how do you connect with an audience through body language?  Not surprisingly, perhaps, connection is first and foremost about closeness.

 

We all unconsciously measure the distance between ourselves and everyone else for obvious reasons of self-protection first and interest second.  Here’s how it works.  Twelve feet or more is public space, the coolest connection between people. Between twelve feet and four feet is social space, a little warmer than public space but still cool.

 

Four feet to a foot and a half is personal space, and now things are beginning to get interesting for us. A foot and a half to zero is intimate space, and we willingly let only people we trust highly or are very fond of in this space.

 

These spaces vary a bit from culture to culture; Mediterranean and Asian cultures tend to shrink the distances, and Western cultures expand them. But all of us have the four zones.

 

Try them out yourself. Walk down the street in a small town, and note when you make eye contact with approaching strangers and when they make eye contact with you. You will find that it is always astonishingly close to twelve feet. I assume this is because at that distance, we can still do something about a danger that presents itself; any closer and we might not have time to react.

 

Now try the move into the personal zone with someone. You’ll see that you keep your eyes, at minimum, on each other, and usually you’ll change your entire physical orientation when someone moves into your personal space.  Interest and energy increase. Your heart rate increases slightly. It’s personal, and you’re connected.

 

If you move into someone’s intimate space, a new level of tension arises, unless of course you are already intimate with that person—a spouse, a very close friend, a parent, or a child.  If you’re not intimate, the closeness will feel uncomfortable for both of you, and typically one or the other of the two people will try to draw back into safer personal space.

 

I’ve demonstrated this phenomenon many times to audiences I’ve lectured to about communication, and it usually gets a laugh because of the discomfort everyone feels.  Once I was talking about the zones with a small group of executives, and I moved into the intimate space of one of the women in the room as I was talking. She responded by giving me a solid right hook to the chest!

 

She apologized afterward, but of course she was simply responding with instinctive appropriateness because I had violated her intimate zone.  Once we all recovered, this incident made the point very well to everyone in the room about how important it is to understand the four zones and how deeply people are conditioned to maintain them. No doubt they developed in prehistoric times as a matter of life and death.

 

We’ve all seen drill sergeants in movies who put their face an inch or two from the hapless inductee and say in stentorian tones that ‘he’s a maggot’.  The point here is that the inductee is not allowed to maintain his intimate space; he’s being broken down in order to be built up again as a Marine, for example. Partly it’s just good theater, but it also violates a real sense of self-protection and so is destabilizing and humiliating for the inductee. These zones are powerful reminders that we are animals who carefully guard our physical and psychic integrity and protect ourselves unconsciously at all times.

 

So how do you use these zones to increase the connectedness with the person or persons you’re trying to communicate with?  Here’s the essential point:  Everything significant in communication between people happens in personal space or intimate space.

Vote for SXSW!  Please click on the following link and vote for the SXSW panels on communications: 

http://bit.ly/EOXXl

How to cut: giving a 3-hour speech in 45 minutes

I spoke this week at a conference of CIOs, talking about authentic communications.  It’s a new version of a speech I’ve given before, but it was time to update it to take into account the latest brain research I talk about in my new book, Trust Me: Four Steps to Authenticity and Charisma – and to take my own medicine. 

 

I’m most comfortable in the seminar format, as a former academic, and I like to have 3 or more hours, a video camera, and lots of interaction.  Now, the structure of a seminar is necessarily different from a keynote speech of an hour or less.  You have to involve the audience more, so that they don’t go crazy with passivity.  And you’re better served to divide the time up into a series of mini-speeches in terms of structure, each with its own beginning, middle and end. 

 

But here I was giving a keynote speech – 45 minutes plus a few questions.  I had to figure out what to jettison, and how to apply my own advice about structure to a format with necessarily less interaction.  There simply isn’t time to prepare for, videotape and play back audience mini-speeches during the course of 45 minutes and still say something of substance.  You can – and should – have audience interaction, but it can’t go on that long. 

 

Moreover, while I’m all for audience volunteers, my group was somewhere between 200 and 250, and it was not going to work for the rest of the audience if I spent a third of my time with one or two representative extroverts. 

 

The first thing I did was think about what my elevator speech was.  If I could focus all that brain research and communications work into one point, I was on the road to developing a focused 45-minute talk.

 

So, I settled on the following:  Audiences today will not be moved to action unless your presentations are authentic, and I will show you how to achieve that authenticity, based on the latest communications and brain research.

 

That could probably be improved, but time was tight and it was good enough to go on.  Then, I had to figure out what the problem was that the audience had for which my material was the solution.  That was easy enough; the conference organizer and I had already worked that out.  The CIOs were all deeply involved in change programs, given the economy and the fast-changing world of IT, and they wanted to know how to make change work.  My answer was that authentic appeals to their employees would work; inauthentic ones would not.

 

That meant that I had to spend the first half of the talk, roughly, laying out the problem of inauthentic communications.  I used a number of humorous videos to show what inauthentic communications looked like, and I began with a quick set of three questions for the audience, and a story of authentic communications to get things rolling. 

 

Then, the second half of the speech was all about how to do it right, with lots of group audience participation.  I had to compress both sections greatly from my seminar format, focusing on a severely limited set of examples, but that was good discipline. 

 

The result?  I kept a close eye on timing, and felt briefly like James Bond as I uttered my last sentence and said “thank you” just as the giant red digital clock on the monitor counted down to zero.  Nothing exploded, the audience applauded nicely, and it all went accordingly to plan. 

 

There’s real satisfaction in delivering a keynote speech to plan.  Thanks to the CIO Magazine conference group for providing the opportunity.  And thanks to the CIOs for being a great audience.  A 45-minute speech is all about focus.  From the elevator speech to the closing seconds, keep your eye on the prize:  getting one point across as clearly as possible.

 

 

What is charisma? And how can you increase your own?

What is charisma?  How can you increase your own?  Most people think that charisma is something magical that people like Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have and the rest of us don’t.  But it’s actually much simpler than that – and something you can control.  

 

Charisma is two things:  authenticity (and by that I mean something quite specific) and attitude -- the passionate expression of emotion. 

 

Most of us don’t radiate a lot of charisma because we’re either not authentically present, right there, in the moment, or because we’re not expressing much in the way of emotion.  We either are split in focus – nervous, thinking about something else, distracted – or we’re bottled up – afraid to show what we really feel. 

 

We tend to put actors high on the charisma list because they’re so good at expressing emotion.  They work on making the emotions very true, even though the circumstances are usually made up. 

 

So how do you increase your own charisma?  First, increase your authenticity.  And that means being absolutely aligned in what you say and how you say it – content and body language.  You can’t be authentic if those two modes of expression are not aligned.

 

Second, increase your passion.  Focus in yourself on how you feel about the moment, the people you’re with, the situation you’re in, and then express that (see #1).

 

Working on these two steps will create a virtuous cycle that will increase your charisma quotient as you get more and more practiced at expressing emotion authentically.

 

I talk about this in more detail in my book Trust Me:  Four Steps to Authenticity and Charisma.  And I’m hoping to land a panel at SXSW 2010 to talk about it.  Please click on the link and buy the book, or if you’re planning to attend SXSW, vote for the panel.

Podcast on Communications and body language

For my blog today, I'm linking to a podcast I did recently with Trip Allen of Egyii, a Singapore-based consultancy (http://www.egyii.com).  Enjoy!  http://tinyurl.com/lsr6bg

How to spot a liar and other topics discussed with Maureen Anderson

For my blog today, a podcast of a radio interview I did with Maureen Anderson of the Career Clinic from the nation's heartland.  We cover a wide range of issues from how to spot a liar to how to control fear in public speaking.  Enjoy!  http://tinyurl.com/lhvvop. 

The Public Speaking Checklist - 10 points to check before you speak

You’re going to give a speech today.  It’s a high-stress time for most of us.  You don’t want to forget something really important.  Following is a checklist for ensuring that when you get up to speak you’re ready – really ready – to go.

1.  Check your computer – is the speech loaded and ready to go?  If your speech is on paper, make sure you have the paper.  With the pages numbered! 

2.  Check your backups – do you have a couple of other ways to give the speech if something goes wrong with the primary method? 

3.  Check your outfit – are your clothes clean, pressed and ready to go?  Do they contrast appropriately with the background you’re speaking in front of?  Do you feel good in them?  Do you have backup clothes ready to go in case someone pours ketchup on your shirt or blouse? 

4.  Check the hall – have you rehearsed in the space?  Do you know what the sound, the lighting, the stage, and the audience perspectives all are?  If you’re traveling there on the day, do you know where it is?  Have you allowed enough time to get there – at least 2 hours in advance?  More if you’re flying there on the day (not recommended)? 

5.  Check the technology – have you tested everything you’re using to make sure it actually works in the space – Power Point, computer connections, video, audio, etc? 

6.  Check with your introducer – have you met the person who is introducing you?  Does that person have an introduction (that you’re provided) ready to go?  Have you talked over the choreography of the introduction and how you’re getting on stage or to the front of the room?  Do you know the schedule of the day – who’s on before and after you? 

7.  Check with your audience – have you done your homework about who they are?  Have you met them?  If you’re not able to meet them, have you talked about them in some detail with the conference organizer? 

8.  Check yourself – have you had enough sleep?  Have you rehearsed the speech?  Have had a little exercise (but not too much) to manage your adrenaline?  Have you eaten/drank enough to keep upright but not comatose?  Are you focused? 

9.  Check your meds – Especially if you’re on the road, do you have aspirin/sinus medication (non-drowsy), any other medicine that you need to get through the day? 

10.  Check your breathing – how nervous are you?  Do you need to do some calming exercises?  Some deep breathing?  Are you focused on an authentic, positive emotion connected with the speech?  How can you get into that mind set if you’re not there? 

The only reason to give a speech is to change the world.  Don't let some detail get in the way of changing the world.  Check the list.  Be ready.  And good luck!

10 Steps You Can Take Right Now to Improve Your Presentations

1.  Lose the Power Point – when you put up Power Point slides you ask the audience to look at 2 – or 3 – things at once: you, your slides, perhaps a printout of your slides. That’s distracting.

2.  Smile – we all look more attractive when we smile, and studies show we pay more attention to attractive people. So smile – unless you’ve got really bad news to deliver.

3.   Talk from the audience’s point of view – a common mistake presenters make is to explain an idea the way they learned it.  But your history is not inherently interesting to an audience.  Instead, start with the audience’s problem – that’s what they’re interested in.

4.  Pause before you start to speak – Wait 3 seconds, making eye contact with the audience, before you start speaking.  It lets the audience know it’s time to pay attention, it builds anticipation, and it increases your charisma. 

5.  Lose the ‘happy feet’ – so many speakers wander around the stage because they’re filled with adrenaline.  Plant your feet and make your point.  Only move (toward the audience) when you’re ready to make another point.  

6.  Breathe!  -- Adrenaline causes us to take shallow breaths.  Breathe instead from your belly – a few deep breaths – without moving your shoulders.  This will calm and ground you. 

7.  Don’t orate – talk to us – Audiences expect to have a conversation with and from speakers.  Stick to a clear outline, so you don’t wander, but don’t read either from a script, or from Power Point slides.  It’s too boring for this ADD age. 

8.  Get emotional – What makes a presentation interesting?  Emotion.  We want to see you get passionate about something.  That’s how we take your measure and learn to trust you (or not).  And don’t tell me there’s nothing passionate in your speech.  If that’s true, you shouldn’t be talking.  Go find something to be passionate about and then talk to us.

9.  Focus on the audience – once you realize that it’s not about you, it’s about the audience, you’ll get over most of your nerves and have a good time.  So know your material well enough that you can truly focus on the audience when you’re speaking.  Check them out to see how they’re doing and be ready to shift gears if it’s not working.

10.  Make it interactive – Audiences get more engaged when they’re allowed to do something. So don’t just talk at us the whole time.  Figure out a way to make your presentation interactive. 

Smart Planet Interview: Comedy, Fear, and Speaking Today

For my blog today I'm linking to an interview I gave to Smart Planet, and Vince Thompson.  We talk about tips for overcoming speaking anxiety, the current state of public speaking today, and how to use comedy in your presentations.  Vince is an Internet entrepreneur, idea man, and author -- and an all-around good guy.  His book is:  Ignited! and you can see it here:  http://tinyurl.com/krkequ. 

The interview is here; enjoy!  http://tinyurl.com/negvab

Can a weak speaker with a great message hold an audience?

Can a weak speaker with a great message hold an audience?  That’s the question that a speaker like Ray Anderson poses.  And can he improve?  I’ll answer that question at the end.  But first, who is Ray Anderson?  You can watch him speak at TED.com: http://tinyurl.com/ndkn5w

Ray Anderson likes to call himself someone who’s made a journey from “plunderer” to “reformed plunderer” to “the greenest CEO in America.”  It’s quite a journey.  Ray is the CEO of Interface, a maker of carpet tile and broadloom carpets.  Some 15 years ago, Ray read Paul Hawken’s book, The Ecology of Commerce (http://tinyurl.com/ra4z4d) and decided that he had to turn his carpet company from a typical “take-make-waste” company to sustainability. 

The results have been – and continue to be – extraordinary.  Ray’s company makes Flor carpet tiles, which are sustainable and eco-friendly and also just plain cool (http://www.flor.com/).  The company has reduced its carbon footprint 82 % while growing by 2/3rds.  Ray estimates that the company is half-way to its goal of zero emissions by 2020.  More than that, costs are down, the products are better, the workers are more inspired, and the free advertising is incalculable. 

Now, Ray’s goal is to transform all of business.  As he says, ‘more happiness with less stuff’ is the big idea. 

So he’s got a great message.  The full story is told, by the way, in Tim Sanders’ excellent book, Saving the World at Work (http://tinyurl.com/r9t3qe). 

Unfortunately, Ray’s not an inspiring speaker.  His voice needs work; it’s pitched too high and his sibilants are too pronounced.  Worse, he doesn’t connect with his audience.  He reads his speech with his nose in the paper, and the result is a sing-song, solipsistic delivery that doesn’t inspire. 

But the audience at TED did get on their feet, slowly, and in sections, to applaud him when he was done.  Why?  The message is great, the man is a hero.  And the speech was short.

The solution?  Rehearse him in brief segments, getting him to get his head up from the page.  By looking down too much of the time, Ray appears to the audience to be closed off from them.  He needs to practice talking to a close friend, or a grandchild, and then he’d get the idea.  I talk more about how to do this here: http://tinyurl.com/qrv3yk.  Ray needs to learn to be as open with an audience as he obviously is to a great idea. 

3 ways Improv can strengthen your public speaking

One of the best ways you can train to become a better public speaker is to take a year of Improv. Most major cities have at least one great Improv troupe that takes on beginners. In Chicago, there’s Second City (http://www.secondcity.com/), in NYC there are a number of choices (try Peoples Improv Theatre: http://www.thepit-nyc.com/), and in Boston, I can recommend ImprovBoston highly (http://www.improvboston.com/).

Why Improv?

Because it helps you become more comfortable on your feet, trains you to react in the moment, and helps you learn not to take yourself too seriously. If that’s not enough, here are 3 lessons from Improv that will improve your public speaking.

1. Yes…And. In the business world, many of us spend a lifetime saying, “yes, but….” in response to every new idea that’s presented to us. Improv trains you to say “Yes, and…” – in other words, to embrace what someone else has offered and create something with it or on top of it. That helps enormously in responding to your audiences as a speaker. You learn to take whatever is thrown at you with a smile and do something positive with it.

2. There are no mistakes. In Improv, you learn that apparent mistakes are often your best opportunity for comedy. In public speaking, we often get in the trap of thinking that there’s only one way to do things. We have a script in mind, and we think something is wrong when we deviate from it. In Improv, you learn to embrace the apparent flub and do something fun with it. Mistakes like that often lead to new insights and understandings.

3. Always stay grounded in the emotional truth. In Improv, you learn not to try to be funny, but rather to tell the truth – the emotional truth. Real comedy comes from that – audiences delight in watching people struggle with true emotional quandaries. In speaking, it’s the same. If you stick to the emotional truth, you’ll never get too far wrong. If you try to fake it, the audience will soon catch on, and you’ll lose them.

Questions for speakers to ask meeting planners

Following is a list of questions that speakers should ask meeting planners in getting ready to speak at an event.  You won't need to ask all of them all the time; the list is meant to give you a broad set of ideas. 

A.  The Venue

When is the speech taking place?
Where?
How many in the audience?
What time of day? How long should the speech be?
Will the audience be eating or have eaten?
What is the hall like?
Is there lighting?
What is the sound like?
The layout?
Are there backdrops, sets, stages, props, podia?
Are there barriers between speaker and audience?
How long is the audience’s day?
How many other speakers?
What is the nature and content of those speeches?
What kind of chair is the audience in?
How long have they sat there?
What is the event theme?
Slogan? 
What is the arrangement for slides and other visuals?
How quiet is the hall? 
Is there background noise?
When can we get in the hall for rehearsal?

B.  The Audience

Describe the audience
What is the age range?
Socio-economics?
Do they know each other?
Do they work for the same or difference orgs?
Describe the organization(s)?
What should my talk be about?
What is the point of the event for the audience?
How is the audience feeling?
What is the business climate?
What does the audience fear most?
What are their hopes and dreams?
What makes them laugh or cry?
What makes them worry?
What do they need to succeed?
What are their cultural references?
What is they worst speaker they’ve ever seen?
What would you like them to do differently as a result of the talk?
Who are their heroes and villains?
What are their recent successes and failures?
Why are they there?
Have you made any arrangements to get feedback? 
A DVD?

C.  The Speech

Why did you pick me?
Who or what determines the success or failure of this event?
How will that be measured?
How does the idea of my speech work for your event?
Give me some audience members that are great (or bad) examples of the points of my speech?
Can I interview them?
What is the problem the audience has for which my expertise is the solution?
Is the audience expecting interactivity?
Is the audience used to Power Point?
Can I ask for volunteers?
How many of them will have read my book?
Can we arrange for a signing/sales event?
What journey do you want the audience to go on?
Why should the audience pay attention to my speech?
How will you know if they have taken something important away from the speech?

What should Seth Godin have done? How do you respond to a last-minute change?

Yesterday, I commented on Seth Godin’s TED.com speech, overall finding it impressive, and making a few suggestions for improvement.  Seth commented on one of those, and his comment has raised an interesting question:  what do you do when you discover that the event organizer has thrown you a last-minute curve?

In Seth’s case, it was a piano in the middle of the stage, eating up the space he normally has for working the audience.  What could Seth have done to cope?

First of all, let’s say that the event organizer had no business messing with a speaker’s mind at the last minute.  The speaker is in adrenaline mode, and it is very hard to change directions under those conditions and with that kind of time pressure.  A pro like Seth has a last-minute series of preparations to go through, and it is unfair and unprofessional to interrupt those with sudden, 11th-hour changes.

But it happens.  So what do you do?  You’ve got to confront it, come up with a plan, deal with it immediately, and get it off your mind.  Otherwise, the result is that it detracts from your performance because it takes up that part of your brain that would normally be delivering a brilliant speech. 

That’s what adrenaline is for:  facing and dealing with problems.  So focus on the issue, come up with a solution – probably imperfect – and then move on.  Don’t second-guess yourself.

The most common curve thrown by meeting planners is the following:  “We’re running a little late, and we need you to shave 20 minutes off your presentation.” 

What do you do? 

This happens so often that you need to have 1-hour, 40-minute, and 20-minute versions of your talk ready to go at all times.  In other words, deal with this one by being prepared in advance so that you won’t be surprised. 

The other kind of last-minute issue that happens all the time is the technology problem.  The room is too bright, making your slides invisible.  The sound system doesn’t have enough volume to make your video audible.  The computer you have is not compatible in some way with the system.  And so on.  The possibilities are endless. 

The response?  Bring back ups.  Lots of back ups.  Everything technological that your presentation depends on should have back ups.  And one more thing:  have a version of your speech ready to go that involves NO TECHNOLOGY.  Think of it as the candlelight version.  One day, you’ll thank me. 

So what should Seth have done when he found that instead of a stage to work in he basically had a closet with no walls? 

He should have used the piano.  In some way.  Always recognize the gorilla in the room.  He might have started by sitting on the piano bench.  Or on the piano.  Perhaps he could have begun by singing (and playing) happy birthday for the event organizer, if in addition to his other talents Seth is musically gifted. 

The exact solution depends on the moment.  But when an event organizer throws you a curve like that, you’ve got to deal with it and move on.  If it’s a real problem, like a sudden decimating of the size of the stage, then it’s best to bring it up, briefly and positively, and move on.  The audience will be on your side if you handle the issue expeditiously and with charm and dispatch. 

Why is most public speaking so awful?

Why is most public speaking so awful? Why do we subject our fellow human beings to this form of torture when there are so many better things we could all be doing, like cutting our toenails, baking snickerdoodles, or watching re-runs of The Prisoner? You’re in a ballroom with no windows in some random airport hotel. The lighting is dim. The whir of the heating system fills your ears with white noise. The colors around you are shades of grey and beige with puce trimmings. You’re only awake because you’ve had 1300 cups of coffee from the urn in the hallway. Let the speaking games begin. It’s a diabolical sensory deprivation experiment. Why is most public speaking so awful? Beyond soulless venues and Death by Power Point, speakers make the same four mistakes over and over again, continuing the sorry state of the art.....

For the rest of this free e-book:  http://www.changethis.com/58.06.PublicWords

Humor in public speaking -- 1: How to use traditional humor

Humor is hazardous to the health of public speakers.  Most speakers want to be funny, but you’ve got to do humor well, or it falls flat and that’s worse than no humor at all.  This week, in honor of May and May Day, I’m going to talk about how to manage humor in public speaking. 

Traditional jokes – with punch lines – are the hardest to do.  My first rule of the week is, don’t try traditional humor.  But if you’re determined – or you think you’re funny – then here are a couple of tips for making the experience good for both you and the audience. 

Let’s start with an example of a funny speech:  http://tinyurl.com/c67xez.  Emily Levine is a self-proclaimed trickster and a very funny person.  She’s Harvard-trained and still manages to be hilarious.  Does that make her a Type-A comedian?  Anyway, Emily’s humor is all about finding the contradictions in modern life that we’ve stopped noticing.  Stuff like the following sign in a beauty salon:

Ears pierced while you wait. 

Just imagine the alternative.  I’ll leave my ears hear until 5.  I’ve got a couple of errands to run.  But I’ll be back to pick them up.  What?  I couldn’t hear you. 

Trickster humor is all about finding those sorts of contradictions and pointing them out.  Also about crossing boundaries that are normally left intact.  If there were an Olympics in martyrdom, my grandmother would have lost on purpose…..

Check out Emily and learn from her.  She’s a comedian in the classic sense – she tells jokes.  That’s very hard to do.  As you watch the talk, note how she ‘sells’ her jokes with her body.  When she talks about not hanging up on telemarketers, because Emily Post says it’s rude, she devises another strategy.  After the telemarketer has delivered about half his pitch, she says, “I interrupted with, ‘You sound really sexy’.  He hung up on me!”  She says the ‘really sexy’ line with a husky voice, and sells the punch line with a pelvic stance.  The tone of voice and the posture are essential to the humor. 

So, if you’re determined to attempt traditional comedy in your speeches, then practice selling the jokes with your body language and voice.  You’re got to be 100 percent committed to the joke – body and all.  And then you’ve got to have a back up plan for recovery.  Study tapes of Johnny Carson – he was the master of what to do when the first joke goes flat.  Often his comebacks and reactions were funnier than the original line. 

Beyond that, look for the contradictions.  That’s where the humor is, and the punch lines.  Traditional humor is all about setting up expectations and then violating them, crossing the boundaries of expectation.  And finding connections where no one else sees them.  Good luck. 

How to Get Ready to Speak: 3 Quick Tips

A speech is performance art.  Each time you speak, you are creating a live experiences for a new audience, and that raises a question:  how do you stay fresh for each occasion, and how do you prepare so that each occasion will be up to the same standard?

 

Speaking is at once head, heart, and body.  It has a lot of moving parts.  So here’s a quick program to carry out before each speech that will get you in peak form.

 

1. The Head.  Every speech has an intellectual ‘spine’ – the basic ideas that you’ll discuss during the course of the speech.  You should know what those are.  In order.  If you don’t, figure them out.  If you do, then run over those in your mind before your speech.  Think of it as the outline, and in an hour-long speech it shouldn’t consist of more than about 10 headings, give or take a few.  If you’re coming up with a lot more than that, you’re going into too much detail for this activity.  

 

This way, you’ll know the intellectual journey you’re taking the audience on and you’ll be more likely not to get lost.  If you know where you are, the audience will too. 

 

Finish this little activity by getting your first couple of lines in your head, so you don’t go blank when you first walk out on stage.  That’s a trick that actors use for opening night, and it helps get you through the beginning jitters.

 

2.  The Heart.  A speech is also an emotional journey, and you need to get that into your head (and gut) before you start, as well.  So spend a moment thinking to yourself, how do I feel about the material I’m discussing?  Excited?  Passionate?  Angry?  Try to experience that feeling, however you bring it to mind.  Recall a time when you felt that way strongly, or just focus on the feeling.  The point is to get into the emotional state you need so that you’ll make that clear to the audience when you begin.

 

3.  The Body.  Finally, you are a physical being delivering sounds in space to other physical beings, so pay attention to the state of your body.  If you’re nervous, that’s a good thing – that’s adrenaline helping you be on your best game.  It will help you think a little faster, stand a little straighter, act a little larger than life. 

 

But not too nervous.  If you’re quite jittery, or if the effects of adrenaline cause you to wander around the stage, or gesture like a windmill, or speak too fast for human ears to understand, then you need to practice some deep belly breathing before you start.  That will calm you, and if you practice it regularly, give you a consistent confidence over time.  Belly breathing starts, not surprisingly, in the belly.  You should expand your stomach like the bulb of an eye dropper as you take air into your lungs.  Hold the air with your diaphragmatic muscles (the ones just underneath your rib cage) and let it out slowly as you exhale.  Remember to breathe occasionally as you speak, too!

 

Paying attention to these 3 aspects of speaking just before you start will greatly increase the quality of your art.  Don’t neglect any of them; they work together to make up the performance art that is public speaking.  I talk more about this in my new book Trust Me:  Four Steps to Authenticity and Charisma. 

The single easiest and fastest way to increase your charisma and impact as a speaker

Working with clients, I spend a lot of time coaching them on delivery skills as well as, of course, helping them write great speeches.  We get the whole range of ability, from brilliant to considerably less than brilliant, and I’m often in the position of conducting triage with a speaker who was trained (or learned his speaking habits) in the Cro-Magnon era.  I’m talking about the type who has 60 Power Point slides for a 30 minute talk, wants to stand behind a podium to read those slides in a monotone, and begins every speech with, “What I’m going to talk about today has seven parts.  The first part….”

Where do you start?

It’s always a battle to wean the speaker off the slides, but it’s worth fighting.  Once you persuade the client that there really is no reason to show the audience his speaker notes, you’re off and running. 

But issues like lack of expressiveness are much harder to combat.  They may be ingrained habits acquired over a lifetime.  And you may not have enough time to work with the client in the depth that it takes to free up the charismatic speaker lurking within.  Deep within.

So, when I’m performing triage, I often turn to a simple, easy way to increase your impact and charisma as a speaker:  get out from behind the podium.  Because we tend to trust people, broadly speaking, who move closer to us (excluding psychos and other scary folks), if you move toward the audience on your key points, finish the point standing near an audience member, and then move to another quadrant of the audience for your next main point, you will instantly increase your effectiveness. 

There are other reasons why this works, based in neurology, but this is quick version for a quick fix.  I go into this in much more detail in my book, Trust Me:  Four Steps to Authenticity and Charisma, but this is enough to get you started. 

4 Steps to Authenticity and Charisma

For my blog today, I'm posting a video blog.  At under 2 minutes, it's a quick 'read'.  Enjoy!

http://tinyurl.com/cnyhzz

3 Reasons to Rehearse a Presentation

Is rehearsal important?  Can you get by without it in an over-scheduled world?  It’s odd that I should even have to pose these questions, but a surprising number of the people we've worked with over the years have tried to wiggle out of rehearsing even important speeches.

Speakers want to deliver charismatic, assured, memorable performances.  Some of them say they want to 'wing it', because thinking too hard about it or preparing too much will make them stale or boring.

Don't believe it, and don't credit that urge in yourself if it comes up.  It's just avoidance.  It's the fear talking.  And more importantly, it's wrong. 

Here are three reasons why you must rehearse in order to deliver a great performance. 

1.  A presentation is both a mental and a physical activity.   So for a presentation to look good and sound good, both your brain and your body have to know the speech.  You can ‘walk through’ a speech in your mind, but the only way for your body to learn the speech is by doing it.  In order to achieve the apparently effortless, natural-looking performance a great stage actor delivers, he or she rehearses for four weeks, give or take, doing the same thing over and over and over again until it has become part of not only the intellectual memory, but also the sense memory.  You should rehearse, at an absolute minimum, three times.

2.  Transitions are the key to an effortless-looking performance.  It’s in the transitions that the differences between a mediocre and a good speech show up most obviously.  The average business speaker creates a speech by pulling together a collection of Power Point slides, some borrowed, some new.  The speaker then shuffles the slides into some kind of order and thinks he’s ready to go.  What we get, then, is the following:  “What this slide shows is….What this next slide is talking about is…”  This kind of clumsy hopping from slide to slide is the mark of a half-digested, under-rehearsed speech.  In rehearsal, you’ll find the ways to make the transitions smooth and logical.

3.  Rehearsal gives you the strength to go the distance.   I’ve seen many an under-prepared speaker suddenly realize, half-way through the speech, that she’s still got 30 minutes to go.  There’s a moment when the speaker signals to the audience that it’s all taking longer than she thought, and everyone in the room picks up on the signal.  The result is that the audience begins to think of the speech, even if the content is good, as an endurance contest.  If you rehearse, you get a sense of beginning, middle, and end, and you learn how to pace yourself. 

Audiences will forgive the occasional verbal slip, but if you look like you don't know what you're doing, they'll write you off as a loser every time.  Rehearse.  Please.  For all of us.

The 3 most powerful ways to increase your personal charisma

In this information-saturated, attention-deprived age, your message has to be sharp and vital to stick in the minds of your listeners – and you have to be even sharper and more vital.  Following are 3 ways to increase your personal charisma to attract the attention you want.

1.  Increase your ability to be open.   At its heart, charisma is emotion.  Great actors and celebrities who have charisma reveal real emotion to us – that’s what captures our attention and draws us in.  The first step in that kind of revelation is openness.  Most of us close ourselves off to others without even realizing it.  It’s part of the automatic, unconscious danger signals our bodies send out to strangers and crowds and people in general when we meet them for the first time.  That’s a survival skill we’ve evolved from the cave, and it worked well then.  But now, we need to be open to audiences rather than braced for flight or fight. 

So, rehearse your presentations and speeches as if you were talking to a close friend, a spouse, or a family member with whom you’re completely comfortable.  Then practice transferring that openness to your actual presentations.  It will be difficult at first, but you will soon learn to have a relaxed, open conversation with your audience, and your charisma will take a giant leap forward. This technique works just as well with meetings, one-on-one conversations, and informal gatherings. 

2.  Get a clear emotional focus in mind.   Most of us, when we’re getting ready to present, or meet with someone important, are thinking about all the things that can go wrong, or we’re stressing out about the technology, or we’re wondering how long it’s going to be until we can get to the bar for a drink.  To increase your charisma, instead focus on the underlying emotional attitude you have toward your message.  Are you excited?  Passionate?  Eager to spread the word?  Focus on one of those sorts of positive emotions, and you’ll show up with much stronger charisma and clearer focus.

3.  Practice physical stillness.  Watch our most charismatic speakers, leaders, and celebrities.  You’ll notice that they avoid extraneous motion and fidgeting.  There’s a stillness at their ‘core’.  It’s at once physical and emotional.  They’re clear about what they’re projecting, and they’re physically focused on the task at hand.  Think in terms of keeping your torso still, upright, and regal, like a king or queen, and you’ll have a rough idea of how you should be holding yourself.

I talk much more about these ideas and techniques in my book, Trust Me:  Four Steps to Authenticity and Charisma, but these 3 should get you started. 

The 5 best ways to conquer your fear of public speaking

I often get asked about the nerves, fear, butterflies, and sheer unadulterated terror that, for most people, accompany public speaking to some degree.  Following are a few ways to ease that fear and make your public speaking more fun.  I’ll start with the best and work my way down to the quick and dirty.

1.  Rehearse and practice.  By far the best way to get over the fear of public speaking is to do it, over and over again.  Both rehearsal and practice help enormously, because you learn that you will live through the experience, that the audience is not going to tar and feather you and make you leave town, and that you do know your stuff.  The best way to rehearse?  In front of a video camera – not the mirror – assuming you haven’t hired a coach like me.  The video camera will show you things that you don’t realize you’re doing and greatly speed up your learning curve. 

2.  Engage in positive self-talk.  The fear comes (for most people) from the mental doom loop that starts up as soon as you get close to giving the talk.  You begin to get a little nervous, and your mind notes the symptoms, and says to itself, “Whoops, my heart is racing, my hands are clammy, my knees are wobbly – it’s going to be a disaster!”  That, of course, makes your physical symptoms worse, and soon you’re in a fine state.  Instead, cut off the doom loop before it begins by chanting to yourself, “I’m going to be fine.  I’ve rehearsed (see #1), I know my stuff, and the audience wants me to succeed.”  Do this constantly, if necessary, and at least whenever a worry thought creeps into your mind.  With practice, you’ll find your negative thoughts virtually disappear.

3.  Breathe deeply and slowly.  I’ve blogged many times on the importance of breathing, but it is the single most important thing to get right after having good content.  We inhabit physical bodies, and they run on fuel – calories and air.  Without the calories, you’ll live for at least a week, but without air you’ll die in minutes.  So breathe!  If you breathe deeply, from the belly, like well-trained singers and yoga instructors, you’ll find that it calms you and grounds you.  With practice, it will dissipate your fears whenever you take a deep breath before you speak. 

4.  Work on your unconscious.   The fear of public speaking comes from deep in the unconscious part of your brain.  We know a lot more now about how that works.  See my new book, Trust Me:  Four Steps to Authenticity and Charisma, for the science behind communication and the fear it provokes.  In the space I have here, I’ll just say that the way to eliminate that fear may sound a little ‘New-Agey’ but it works.  Every night, as you’re falling asleep, chant something to yourself over and over again, like, “I love public speaking and I’m confident when I do it.”  If you do this regularly EVERY NIGHT for at least 3 weeks, your fear of speaking will leave you. 

5.  If all else fails, do what the musicians do:  take beta blockers.   The other ways are much better for you, but if you lack the discipline or the will power, then get a beta blocker prescription from your doctor.  It’s what three quarters of professional musicians do, by one poll.  It’s the pharmaceutical way to calm you down.  You’ll still have the panicky thoughts, but you won’t care. 

Good luck!

How unconscious intent can sabatoge your communications before you start

We are all unconscious experts in reading other people’s intent.  We do that by evaluating their gestures in a part of the brain that never reaches the level of conscious thought.  That has profound implications for public speaking and communications in general.

First of all, our ‘read’ is incredibly fast.  The nanosecond someone walks toward us, we have already evaluated him or her in terms of threat.  Our unconscious brains are constantly asking, ‘is this person friend or foe?’ and if the answer is ‘friend’, we relax and greet the person.  If the answer is ‘foe’, adrenaline courses through our system, we tense up, we breathe shallowly, prepared for fight (or flight) and so on.  All of that happens before we’ve even had a conscious thought about the other person.

That means that, for a communication (or a speech) to be successful, you must prepare beforehand so that the encounter can go well.  If you just walk up on stage, full of your own nervousness and agenda, before you even get to the podium you will have sent, and received, ‘foe’ messages to the audience.  All hope of a successful exchange will have gone before you start. 

In order to overcome your natural nervousness, you have to start a positive train of associations and behaviors going.  You have to begin by intending to be open, or else the opposite will happen before you know it, literally.

So that’s your first job as a speaker, and in communications generally.  Start by being open, before the communication gets underway.  Avoid setting off our ancient survival mechanisms, and work on a positive agenda.  It will mean the difference between failure and a chance of success.

I go into this work in much more detail in my new book, Trust Me:  Four Steps to Authenticity and Charisma, published by Jossey-Bass on January 5, 2009.

Trust Me -- Non-verbal Communications -- 2

More than ever, we demand authenticity of our leaders today.  The ones we haven’t already given up on.  And so of course authenticity is essential in communications. 

What is the latest research telling us about how to understand – and create – authenticity?  Can it in fact be created? 

The next big communications idea from neurological research is that we are unconscious experts in reading each other’s body language.  That was important for survival once, and it’s still essential for day-to-day living. 

The key word is ‘unconscious’.  We’re not very good at reading body language consciously.  It’s too subtle, it happens too fast, and we’re not wired to understand it.  But, at the unconscious level, something marvelous happens.  We don’t just read the body language.  We ascribe intent to it, and we do that in the blink of an eye – literally, before we can form a conscious thought about it. 

That is, we see a hand gesture, and, rather than stopping with that, saying to ourselves, Oh, what an interesting hand gesture, we react unconsciously to the intent:  she must be angry at me.  Then, we may have a conscious thought about it.  Or we may react emotionally, and just get uneasy. 

What that means to communicators is that much of our communication happens unconsciously, instantly, and before conscious thought.  That has important implications for how speakers show up – with authenticity, or not. 

If you show up unprepared, and nervous, the odds are good that your body language will signal that to the other bodies in the room.  People will read you as insincere, unprepared, incompetent, and so on.  The unconscious dialog will already be signaling trouble long before you’re consciously ready to try to make a good impression. 

The unconscious doesn’t make exceptions or give you a break.  It doesn’t think, he’s just probably a little nervous because it’s the beginning of a speech.  It just thinks, Oh-oh.  Trouble ahead.  One of the pack is nervous.  In fact, the one who’s supposed to be the alpha in charge. 

You’ll have failed to seem authentic, the fundamental test of leadership today, before you’ve fairly started.

That’s why it’s so important to prepare adequately for an important speech, meeting, or event.  That’s why it’s so important to be clear about the story you’re telling and your emotional attitude toward it.  That’s why it’s so important to be consistent in what I call the two conversations – content and body language. 

This insight is at the heart of my new book, Trust Me:  Four Steps to Authenticity and Charisma.  http://www.amazon.com/Trust-Me-Steps-Authenticity-Charisma/dp/0470404353/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1229113611&sr=1-1  Authenticity is too important to leave to chance today.  And so is charisma. 

Stewart Brand on TED.com

Stewart Brand is one long-term cool individual.  He was associated with Ken Kesey’s Merry Pranksters, he founded The Whole Earth Catalog, and he wrote one of the most interesting books on buildings ever written:  How Buildings Learn.  That last one will change the way you think about habitable space.  If you haven’t read it, you should before you buy a house to live in.   

So we’re talking about someone who has been around a long time in human terms and who has a deep perspective on the way humans live on the planet. 

Currently, he’s working with an organization that encourages really long views.  For example, he’s working on a project that’s trying to develop and find a home for a 10,000-year clock.  That’s a hundred centuries. 

Where do you locate something like that?  It has to be a place that will withstand an enormous amount of change, to say the least.  Brand manages to make the quest for a good home for the clock a story about stories – specifically the 7 stages of the mythic adventure:  http://www.ted.com/index.php/talks/stewart_brand_on_the_long_now.html. 

First, he says, you have to get an image of the goal in your mind.  Then, you need a good jumping off point.  Third, you must go through a labyrinth.  Fourth, you need a beacon – something to help you find the goal.  Fifth, you need a payoff – and a secret, unexpected payoff.  Sixth, you need to return, and last, you need a memento of your journey.

He quite seriously investigates a remote mountain range in Nevada for all these properties.  Most of it matches pretty well. 

It’s a very entertaining subject.  Unfortunately, it’s delivered in an amateurish way. 

Brand’s talk beautifully illustrates the danger of speaking on the fly.  He clearly wrote the talk shortly before he was to deliver it.  The result is that a normally confident, engaging speaker is tied to notes, too many slides, and a podium that gets between him and his audience. 

He spends too much time with his head in his notes, or figuring out which slide comes next.  The talk itself needs editing and tightening.  The organizing principal of the 7 stages of a mythic adventure doesn’t quite allow him to cover everything he wants to cover, so he wanders off into the other areas, undercutting the inherent strength of the core of the talk. 

It’s too bad; it’s like watching a famous musician learn a new piece, with all the mistakes and hesitations all-too-clearly visible. 

What separates the mediocre and the excellent in public speaking?  Practice. 

TED.com -- 9 -- Keith Schacht and Zach Kaplan

A talk on TED.com inspired me because I often get questions about presenting in pairs – people ask, is it a good idea, how do you do it, what are the pitfalls, and so on.  Keith Schacht and Zach Kaplan are two lovable nerds who run something called Inventables, which seems to be a company that collects ideas and products that use materials in new ways.  For example, they demonstrated magnets in soft materials, ink that could remember what page you were on in a book, and dots that change color with changing smells – so you could tell visually when the milk has gone bad. (http://www.ted.com/index.php/talks/toys_from_the_future.html)

It’s fun stuff, especially the 10-foot pole you can roll up in your pocket, which inspired much hilarity from the audience. 

Well, these two guys aren’t great presenters – they’re stiff and monotone, with limited expressiveness in their body language – but the talked worked well enough for the audience present in the room for a couple of reasons.

First, they used an audience volunteer for the ‘dry’ water squirt gun.  Audiences always feel more included in a talk when a ‘volunteer’ is chosen, because of the mirror neurons I’ve blogged about before.  The rest of the audience is at once glad not to be chosen, and glad to be (vicariously) part of the experience. 

Second, they managed the hand-offs well, if a little stiffly.  They took turns, neither one speaking for too long.  That’s important, because it’s hard to be the one not speaking in a duo.  What do you do?  The answer is, you model good behavior and listen to your partner like billy-o, but that’s hard because you’ve probably heard the talk many times. 

I used to co-present with a friend and colleague with a sense of humor.  He would turn to me in the middle of his part of the talk and say, “Nick will now demonstrate the 5 reasons why public speaking can be challenging for left-handed people,” or something equally bizarre.  This was, of course, without warning.  The hilarity for him was in watching me scramble to come up with the five ideas.  It was all in fun, and we both had training in Improv, so it was not unjustified, but it certainly got my adrenaline flowing. 

That’s why it’s so important to listen hard to your partner.  You’re there to support.  So support well.  Be ready. 

Third, the material was humorous.  Paired talks lend themselves to humor, because of the opportunity to play off one another. 

But what else could Keith and Zach done to truly exploit the possibilities of join presenting? 

What’s interesting about two people is their relationship.  That’s the only real reason to get 2 people up on stage together. It makes up for the logistical challenges involved.  (Keith and Zach didn’t reveal enough about their relationship to make it really interesting.  Either one of them could have given the talk without any loss of interest.)

It’s why newscasters spend a surprising amount of time interacting with one another rather than actually reading the news, or the weather, or sports.  What keeps us coming back to these kind of shows is the relationships.  Indeed, most shows don’t do enough to exploit the inherent interest there.  Fans of detectives with sidekicks know what I mean.  Fans of Star Trek who lived for the quips about Spock from Kirk and Bones at the end of the show also know what I mean.   

Presenting in pairs is more fun for the pair.  You’ve got someone else there to share the burden.  Just make sure that you give the audience sufficient value to make it worthwhile for them too.  Use the relationship in relevant ways to enrich the presentation. 

What can we learn about communicating from the debates?

For the partisans on both sides, post-debate analysis is all about spin.  But nonetheless, I’m going to try to give a fairly evenhanded reaction to what I saw in terms of the alignment of the two conversations, the verbal (content) and the non-verbal (body language).  I’ve been waiting until the passions cooled a little on the Palin-Biden debate, just because people are so unreasonable on that subject.  So here goes.  SPOILER ALERT:  I’m going to say tough things about all four candidates.  DON’T READ THIS if you’re a hopeless partisan who sees criticism of your candidate as unpatriotic or worse.

Joe Biden – on the plus side, he had good command of the facts, he appeared to take the debate seriously, and he was respectful to his opponent.  On the negative side, he kept his hand in his pocket too much, and when he registered passion (or at least pique) his voice went high and nasal, and stayed that way too long.  When you keep a hand in a pocket, we wonder what you’re hiding, and when your voice goes nasal, we find it irritating.  He needs to support with good breathing when he takes his voice higher, and keep his hands where we can see them.  NO WHINING, JOE! 

Sarah Palin – on the plus side, she appeared relaxed, after quite a bit of initial nervousness.  She has impressive poise for someone who has just been thrust onto the national scene.  That poise served her very well during her speech at the Republican convention; less well with Katie Couric because you could tell when she was trying to bull her way through an answer.  It would have been better to admit that she didn’t know.  She’s allowed; she’s only been ‘at this for five weeks’. 

In terms of content, she stuck to her prepared answers on taxes and energy, regardless of the questions.  Sometimes that worked, but often her bridging was weak and it was blatantly obvious she wasn’t answering the question.  Audiences don’t like people who don’t respond to the question; bridging is an important art and skill and she needs more practice. 

Her folksiness either grated on you, or you loved it.  All the shout-outs, the you betchas, and the say-it-ain’t-so-Joes – that either made you believe she was just like you, or it made your skin crawl.  Her winking and condescension toward Biden would have been outrageous if their gender roles were reversed; I found it off-putting.  But her main problem was an inconsistency in the two conversations – she smiled when she was actually angry.  That makes us not trust her.  DON’T SMILE WHEN YOU’RE ANGRY, SARAH!

John McCain – on the plus side, McCain sounded best when he was talking about his service to his country.  Then, his voice has the right timbre and gravitas.  On the negative side, when he was criticizing Obama, his voice went high and nasal, like Biden’s, and sounded condescending.  As a result, he was irritating.  If you watched the audience reaction meters on CNN, you saw that happening in real time.  Whenever he went negative, the dials went down, as much because his voice was irritating as anything else. 

But McCain’s main problem was happy feet, when he was talking, and when he was listening.  Once again, audiences look for alignment of the two conversations.  When they are not aligned, we believe the non-verbal.  So, when McCain says that he’s got the experience, a steady hand, and can handle our scary economic problems, but his feet are wandering all over the stage, we believe the feet.  Unconsciously, we think he’s wandering, mentally, just like he is physically.  PLANT YOUR FEET, JOHN!

McCain's wandering around when Obama was answering just looked rude. 

Barack Obama -- the best debater of the four in terms of clarity, logic, and coherence of his answers.  He planted his feet when he addressed his audience, and so we believe that he has the mental solidity a president needs.  Obama’s problem is that when he tries to display passion, his voice goes up, but the rest of him stays cool.  He pinches his thumb and forefinger together when he’s making a point, regardless of how he feels about it, and the result is that he appears too passionless.  LOSE THE PRISSY GESTURE, BARACK!  Obama needs to let us see some real temper, or we’re going to think he’s aloof, and we won’t trust him.  We need to see that he’s got some skin in the game. 

How Sarah Palin Should Prepare... and How You Should Too

I recently posted an entry on Harvard Business Publishing's blog page.  Join the conversation at:  http://conversationstarter.hbsp.com/2008/09/how_sarah_palin_should_prepare.html

Back to basics -- 7

In the end, it all comes down to the audience.

A standard communications model looks like this:  sender – receiver – medium – signal – noise – feedback.  Most people who give speeches worry about the sender (the speaker) and the signal (the speech) quite a bit – and the receiver (the audience) quite a bit less.  Yet, if the audience doesn’t hear and understand the speech, the communication has not happened.  So in the end, the audience is the most important part of any presentation. 

Your job as speaker is to know that audience better than they know themselves.  Of course, you need to find out all the essential details for your upcoming presentation – where, when, why, what, and so on.  And you need to get all the basics about the audience down – their demographics, their number, what they’re expecting, what else is happening during the day, whether or not they’ve been fed or are looking forward to a meal, and so on.  Beyond that, you need to get into their minds.  Who are they?  What do they fear?  What are their hopes and dreams?  Research the answers to these questions, and you’re ready to talk to them. 

Giving the talk, you need to know it so well that you can dedicate part of your brain to watching and reacting to the audience’s state of mind.  This takes time and practice to master, because most speakers have only one question on their minds:  do they love me?  As a result, speakers tend to interpret everything the audience does in these terms.  But a furrowed brow may not mean that the audience member hates you; it may simply be that she is listening intently.  Don’t be paranoid, and don’t overestimate your charm, either.  Just listen carefully to them, and react when the circumstances call for it. 

After the talk, make yourself available to anyone who wants to follow up with questions or comments.  This is your time to be generous; this is the feedback loop and it’s important.  Don’t worry; most of the people who approach you will be thanking you or looking to touch the hem of your garments because they’re star-struck.  Humor them, and humor the rare audience member with a gripe, too. 

Audiences want you to succeed.  If you meet them half way, they will reward you with extraordinary enthusiasm.  That’s because so many speeches are so bad.  The bar is set very low.  But if you disappoint them with irrelevancies or pomposity or self-aggrandizement, they will leave you and never come back.  In the end, the audience determines the success (or not) of the speech.  Remember that it’s all about them. 

Back to basics -- 6

The secret to successful public speaking is to have a good time.  That’s the zen insight into the performance art that is presentation giving.  Of course, you have to do your homework, write a good speech, rehearse it effectively, and so on, but once you’re finally standing in front of that audience ready to share your passion with them, make it fun.  Let go of your technical worries, your insecurities, and your concerns about whether or not the audience will love you.  Have a good time.

If you have fun, the audience can too.  Everyone relaxes and the interaction between audience and speaker flows. 

A public communication doesn’t happen unless the audience gets it.  It’s not enough for you just to speak; the audience has to hear you.  And they will hear you most effectively if they can see that you’re OK, in charge, and having fun.  If they are worried about your mental state, they won’t be able to hear you as clearly.

So when it comes down to it, remember that the audience wants you to succeed.  Have a blast. 

Back to basics -- 5

You must rehearse in order to give a good presentation.  If you don’t rehearse, your body language will give you away.  Your body will say to the audience, this person is going through this experience for the first time, and that won’t look particularly competent. 

I’ve written another series of blogs on how to rehearse, so I won’t go into that here.  I’ll talk instead about why you must rehearse. 

I hear from busy executives all the time that they don’t want to rehearse because it will make them stale, or they’ll bore themselves and the audience, or other such faux concerns.  Interestingly, I never get those excuses from the professional speakers we work with.  They’re always ready to rehearse because they know it makes the difference between exuding confidence and competence – and not. 

Smart speakers will rehearse a speech they’ve given a thousand times before because it’s a new audience, a new venue, or simply a sound system they want to check out. 

The point is, audiences like surprises, but speakers don’t – or shouldn’t.  I have a rule of threes for this:  I can always tell a speaker that’s under-rehearsed because by the time the third unexpected thing happens, the speaker begins to melt down.  Let’s say the room is not quite the layout the speaker expected.  OK, he makes mental adjustments, then soldiers on.  But then the A/V equipment isn’t working properly, and the speaker and the sound people have to make some quick adjustments on the fly. 

The speaker takes a deep breath; he is beginning to get flustered, but on with the show, right? 

Then, his opening joke falls flat, and it’s Armageddon.  Too many things have gone wrong; his mental capacity is overwhelmed, and the speaker has his tail between his legs from then on.  The audience senses difficulty and radiates concern back to the speaker.  It’s a downward spiral that few pull themselves out of, even experienced speakers. 

Don’t let that happen to you.  Rehearse the speech, even if you’ve given it before.  Check out the room, and have a sound and equipment check.  Do all this the day before, or at least a few hours before, so that you have time to fix anything that’s wrong.  You, your body language, and the audience will all benefit enormously. 

Back to basics -- 4

Every communication is two conversations, the verbal (the content) and the non-verbal (the body language).  When the two are aligned, a speaker can be persuasive, even charismatic.  When the two are not aligned, audiences believe the non-verbal communication every time. 

This insight has important implications for public speaking.  Chief among them is that you cannot give a successful speech with the best content in the world if your body language is disconnected from the content.  The audience will believe the body language. 

We are all unconscious experts in body language.  What we do is interpret it at an incredible rate of speech (actually faster than conscious thought) in terms of the intent of the other person.  Presumably this ability evolved from our caveperson days when our survival depended on it.  Nowadays, it doesn’t as often, but we still react instantly to perceived threats, sudden movements, and the arrivals of strangers. 

This means that, if you’re a speaker, you have in front of you an audience that is constantly construing your behavior in terms of its own needs, concerns, and fears.  So what matters most in body language is how you’re interpreted, not what you mean.  I’ve had clients that have said, “It’s just comfortable for me to stand this way in front of an audience,” and I’ve had to explain to them that comfortable for them may be insulting, off-putting, disengaging, or even simply defensive for the audience. 

Get yourself filmed while rehearsing an important speech and study your own body language.  Is it engaging?  Does it connect with the audience?  Do you look comfortable, glad to be there, and eager to talk to the group? 

It’s your job as a speaker to manage both conversations you’re having with the audience, the verbal and the non-verbal.  There’s lots more to be said about how to do that, but the basic point is that you are responsible for both your content and your body language in front of an audience.  You need to pay close attention to both in order to be successful. 

Back to basics -- 1

I’m going to do a series of blogs on the basics of public speaking in honor of the Fall, the presidential campaign, and my new book, Trust Me:  Four Steps to Authenticity and Charisma, coming out in December from Jossey-Bass.  So here goes with the first 'basic' of giving great speeches. 

Speeches should be about one thing.  No more.  You should be able to sum up your presentation in one sentence – the elevator speech.  We must remain strong to fight communism, promote peace, and improve the economy at home.  That’s a one-sentence summary of President John F. Kennedy’s inaugural address.  Help me work toward realizing my dream of racial equality.  That’s the elevator speech for the Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr.’s “I have a dream” oration. 

You get the idea.  Great speeches – successful speeches – confine themselves to one clear message.  And this is not a message like some company’s anodyne vision statement.  It should have a real point of view, emotion, and involve the audience in some way. 

The great weakness of many political and business speeches is that they try to do too much.  They lack clarity and punch, because the speaker won’t confine him- or herself to one topic and one point of view.  Politicians want to bond with as many people as possible, naturally, and so must constantly fight the temptation to try to be all things to all people.  Or they take the laundry list approach, figuring that a speech that goes on forever will have something for everyone in it. 

Business people suffer from the same temptations and have to fight the same battles.  Both groups also often want to avoid offense to some faction, and so make their language fuzzy in an effort to anger no one.  In so doing, they usually manage to confuse everyone. 

If you can’t summarize your talk in one clear sentence, you’re not ready to speak.  Figure out your elevator speech and get back to us.  

The Pause -- 2

I received a number of great comments and emails on my first blog on ‘the pause’ so I’m following up with another one, with a little more information on this essential part of public speaking. 

You can always tell an inexperienced teacher or speaker by the way they respond after they ask the audience a question, or for some kind of feedback.  They will wait a heartbeat, and then answer the question or add a comment themselves. 

That’s fatal, because it sends out a message to the audience that the speaker (or teacher) will ask questions, and then answer them.  So the audience can simply sit there passively, doing nothing, and check out, intellectually speaking. 

Instead, you (the speaker) must pause.  There was a study done of how long it takes people to fill that awful silence; the average is 6 seconds.  So count it out if you have to, but wait!  As I said in the first blog, it will feel like forever, but that’s because you’re in adrenaline time.  The audience is merely registering that you’ve asked a question, thinking whether or not it knows the answer, deciding whether or not it wants to hazard a response, and starting to work up the nerve to respond.  That all takes time. 

I guarantee you that, if you ask the audience something, and then wait expectantly, by the time 6 seconds is up, someone will take pity on you and respond. 

A former colleague of mine had a great phrase for another use of the pause.  He always said, “Watch it land,” meaning your point.  When you’re saying something wonderful, look into the audience’s eyes and see it land.  See, in other words, how it comes across.  Do they get it?  Do they think it’s profound?  Are they moved?  Laughing?  Struck dumb with wonder?  And so on. 

For really profound points, you may want to solicit feedback after pausing to let the point land. 

Wait for a 3-second count, and then ask, “What do you think?”  or, “Who has an experience relating to (this point) that you’d like to share?”  or, “Let me get some feedback here.  Is this making sense to you?”  and so on. 

A third place to pause is after an audience member asks a question.  Wait until you’re sure that the questioner is done, pause for a 3-count, and then answer. 

This pause accomplishes several good things.  First, it ensures that you’ve heard the questioner fully – an important courtesy.  Second, it allows you to formulate a better response than if you just leap into the answer without sufficient thought.  And last, it allows the rest of the audience to decide whether or not they’re on the side of the questioner.  This last point comes in handy when you get a heckling question, for example.  A pause allows you to work up a better response, and also allows the audience to decide that the questioner is a jerk. 

Practice your pauses.  They are the sign of a good speaker, like a good jazz player, who understands that it’s the spaces in between the notes where the real mastery lies. 

How did the speech go?

I gave the speech this morning in a conference room holding about 60 people in that banquet-round-table style beloved of conference organizers.  The round tables make it hard to work the audience properly, but everyone loves a challenge, right?  So I stood in the middle of the long side and that way was able to see and be seen reasonably well by most people.  The arrangement made for a lot of weaving in and out of tables, but there you are. 

Lesson:  always ask up front about the room layout and negotiate a good one if you can. 

The event ran late, and my own start time was delayed 25 minutes.  I had to give a little time back on the fly, which is always annoying and challenging.  In the end, we compromised and they let me run a little long.  The overall event ended on time, something I believe to be essential.  No one ever wanted a meeting to run longer than scheduled, and no one ever complained when one ended early. 

Lesson:  be clear about your time requirements and their time constraints. 

How did it go?  I had fun, especially because I went to the audience from the very start, interacting with them, giving out prizes for participation, running a contest, and generally carrying on.  I like to make audiences 'work' and they like it too.  It beats passivity and boredom. 

Lesson:  the more audience interaction the better. 

In the end, I had the audience divided up, telling stories (the speech was about authentic storytelling) and competing for the best story.  It was a nice group, and they wanted to declare everyone a winner, so we did, with one participant a little more of a winner than everyone else. 

Lesson:  everyone's a winner if everyone participates. 

Overall, it went fine.  I could have done with more rehearsal.  I've been spoiled by giving the same speech, or similar speeches, many times.  I've forgotten how hard it is to give a speech for the first time. 

Lesson:  rehearse, rehearse, rehearse. 

I'm Giving a Speech Tomorrow

I'm in the unusual position of having to take my own advice -- I'm giving a new speech tomorrow.  I usually talk on individual communications, but this time the topic is communicating brands.  That's a subject I've worked on with companies over the years, but I don't usually lecture on the subject.

I rehearsed on Friday, and it did not go very well.  I realized that I need to take my own advice, and quickly.  So here are my three most essential rules for fixing a speech and getting it ready to go, when you're facing a deadline.

First, focus on one message and one message only.  I realized during rehearsal that I was trying to do too many things.  I need to whittle the speech down to one clear message:  Why each employee must become a passionate storyteller on behalf of the company brand in today's marketplace.  I'm going back to the draft to eliminate everything that doesn't support that one point.  Focus is essential for successful public speaking. 

Second, find a good hook that frames the message of the speech so that your audience is intrigued and brought into the discussion.  I've been trying out several openings, one a story, one a question, and a few others.  I've got to pick the one that best answers the question, why are we here?, for the audience. 

Third, deliver the speech in the problem-solution format.  The rehearsal made clear that I was trying to be too clever with my structure.  The only one that makes sense, when you're trying to persuade the audience of something, is problem-solution.  That's because our minds are structured to solve problems, and when we hear one presented to us, we automatically begin to think about how to solve it.  The structure follows our natural thinking processes, so we're happy. 

So I've got some work to do, to repair the speech, simplify it, and focus it on the audience.  Then, I'll be ready for another rehearsal.  The deadline approaches!

Rehearsal 8 -- Conclusion

OK, I've given you lots of ways to rehearse.  You won't do all of them, unless you really want to be good and you have the time, but you should at least rehearse several times before a big presentation.  The alternative, winging it, is never as good as you think it is.  And your audience won't tell you the truth. 

Unfortunately, what happens is that the speaker who wings it gets pumped full of adrenaline, comes charging off the stage and asks the first person he sees, 'how was it,' with a big smile on his face.  Only a churl would reply with, 'well, it was disorganized, there were lots of minor screw-ups, and you kept making the same points over and over again'.  Most people say, 'it was great!' and the speaker think to himself, 'That's all right then; next time I'll do it the same way.  Obviously I'm too cool to rehearse'. 

In that way bad public speaking is perpetuated. 

Now, don't get me wrong.  There are times when off the cuff remarks are fine -- indeed, preferred.  It depends on the formality of the occasion.  The less formal, the more off-the-cuff is OK. 

I've often heard it said that, for most men, the first time they have to give a speech is when they're called upon to give the toast as the best man at a friend's wedding.  I don't know if that's factually true or not, but it certainly calls up a host of memories of bad best man speeches.  That's a formal occasion, last time I checked, and deserves a little preparation.

Informal occasions where you might wing it are regular meetings where you don't have a prominent spot on the agenda.  That sort of thing.  Where the stakes are low.  Where it would look odd to have prepared remarks.   

Ultimately, the problem with winging it is that it shows that you don't think the occasion is very important.  That sends out a message which can easily be taken the wrong way by people who do think it's important.  You have to decide whether it's worth it to anger those folks for the sake of avoiding a few rehearsals. 

Rehearsal 7 -- The Dress Rehearsal

The last full rehearsal you do should take place the day before, or 2 days before, the actual event.  It should take place in the hall itself, it should involve the full technical panoply of video, music, slides, and so on that you're using, and you should go the whole distance.  By that I mean, don't skip chunks; do the whole speech so that you get a good feel for how long it will take.

Dress rehearsals should follow the script just as if they were the real thing.  The only difference is that there is no audience, or only a small one of hangers-on, nosy people who won't go away, and nervous bosses. 

You should throw yourself into the dress rehearsal with all you've got.  Don't hold back just because it's only practice.  If you don't practice the real thing, how will you know what it's like?

It will be sufficiently different with an audience so that it will feel fresh on the day itself.  And that's all that matters. 

The less-well-understood point of rehearsing, by the way, is to get a feel for the physicality of the speech -- the non-verbal aspects -- which are so important to the way the audience actually decodes your messages.  Every speech is two conversations, the verbal and the non-verbal, and you need to be in control of both.  Because when they are aligned, you can be persuasive.  When they're not aligned, the audience believes the non-verbal every time. 

Preparing a speech means preparing both conversations.  And the only way to find out what that second conversation looks like is to rehearse.   

Rehearsal 6 -- The Opening Rehearsal

The openings of speeches are incredibly important for setting the mood, the audience expectations, and the energy level in the house.  That's tough, of course, because that's when most speakers are nervous and tentative. 

Don't be.  There's nothing natural about this.  It's not about being yourself.  It's about forcing yourself to walk -- or bound -- out on stage with focus, with energy, already thinking that the audience is comprised of some very close friends you're really glad to see. 

So a little self-hypnosis or self-talk is in order.  Go watch actors backstage during a show.  You'll see them all getting into what they call the 'offstage beat'.  That means they don't walk on stage and then think about delivering a line.  They come from somewhere, already in a mood, already heading somewhere with something on their minds, already busy doing something.

You need an offstage beat, too.  Get into a frame of mind, such as I'm-about-to-see-a-close-friend-that-I-haven't-seen-in-years-that-I'm-going-to-hug.  Or something like that.  Whatever floats your psychic boat.  But make it positive, friendly, and all about connecting with someone. 

OK, so that's what you need to rehearse.  Go offstage, get psyched, and then come charging on mentally hugging everyone in the audience and deliver your first line.  Or better yet, your first story.

By the way, spending the first few minutes saying "hi" and "how's everyone in Topeka?" is amateur stuff.  Don't waste that opening opportunity to grab your audience and never let go.  Start with some vivid, interesting, dramatic, or exciting.  Jump right in and tell us the best story you know.  Or ask the audience something compelling they haven't thought about.  Or interact with them in a more compelling way.  Get some of them up on stage, or go into the audience and start conversing with them.  You get the idea. 

Rehearse the opening.  Get an offstage beat.  Don't waste the moment of maximum interest.  Start with a bang.  You can repair the damage done by a wasted opening, but it's hard work and takes the rest of the speech.

Rehearsal 5 -- The Walk-Through Rehearsal

I've written about the deer-in-the-headlights phenomenon before, when a speaker faces one too many unexpected obstacles and finds himself losing concentration and staring blankly at the source of the latest disaster wondering, 'what do I do now'? 

It doesn't have to be that way.  When you've got a big speech, insist upon a walk-through, or technical rehearsal.  Get together the day before the event, or at the very latest the morning of the event, with the technical people upon whom your life will depend.  Walk through the speech paying attention to all the technical aspects of the delivery. 

What does it feel like to be miked?  Does it restrict movement?  Can you be heard?  How are the sound levels? 

What about the lighting?  Does it shine in your eyes?  Get used to it.  Practice not squinting, looking just below the spotlights out to the audience.  Can it follow you if you move?  If you're going out to the audience, work that with the tech folks.  They'll need to have a follow spot, or to turn the house lights up.

What about the camera coverage?  Where do you need to be?  Again, if you're going into the audience (and you probably should be at some point), then you're going to have to work that out with the techies.  They're going to be inclined to say they can't manage it, but they can if they really put their minds to it.  So negotiate that nicely, since their help and cooperation is essential for a successful show.

What about slides, notes, visual aids, music, sounds, video, and so on?  Practice all that with the technical folks and have a plan B in case something goes horribly wrong and nothing works.  Probably won't happen, but you want to be ready if it does.  (And if you cover well, and respond heroically, you'll get a hero's reception from the audience.) 

Walk the entire hall, to get a sense of how big it is.  Check out the sight lines, because you want to know how tiny you look from the back, or if you're blocked by something from the side.  Get to know the space, so you can fill it with your presence.  The bigger the hall, the more energy is required.  Check out Mick Jagger tapes to see how much energy is required to fill a stadium.  It's a lot.

A tech rehearsal, or walk-through, is essential when the stakes, and the hall, are big.  Don't leave it to chance or to the last moment.  Remember Murphy's Law.